Lemony Snicket wants revenge from the Baudelaires
by I am Chaos
Summary: The Baudelaires think they are real, until the truth comes out. Chapter 3 is up!
1. Klaus's Encounter

Chapter One-- Klaus Encounters Someone  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any part of The Series of Unfortunate Events because if I did, the eleventh book would already be out! *stares furiously at Lemony Snicket* Actually guys, I think you wouldn't want me to own the book thingies because the story would totally go amiss-- a word which here means 'unexpected; gone the wrong way' in my hands. The only person I do own in this story is me, who's name will be Kali.  
  
"LET ME OUT OF THIS BOX!!!!!!" Klaus bellowed-- a word which here means 'screamed in a deep, loud voice with all the strength he could muster '-- through one of the holes on the box.  
Violet paced back and forth in front of the box and said, "Klaus, you need to learn not to be afraid of the dark before the age of 8!" Since Klaus was only seven and afraid of darkness, Violet came up with a nice invention of a metal box in the corner of his room with just enough room for Klaus to sit or stand. In this case, Klaus stood at the very corner of the box, closing his eyes as hard as possible.  
"You're torturing him," said Mrs. Baudelaire, who had just come into the room; hearing Klaus's screams. Violet turned around and scowled.  
"Mom, I'm not doing anything!" she said furiously. "Klaus! Hurry up and surrender, I'm getting tired of waiting!" Klaus still stood at the corner of the metal box with his closed eyes.  
"I need an axe, Violet." He said through one of the ventilation holes.  
"For what?" asked Violet in her annoyed tone.  
"Errr," stuttered Klaus. "To, umm... to....to, well I need it to calm myself down. Oh yes and I need some batteries and a mirror. Fast." Klaus wasn't stupid and knew that he could make a flashlight out of a mirror and an axe. The batteries were just for his amusement. And with the axe, Klaus could get himself out of the box, if he hit hard enough.  
A couple of hours later, Violet opened up the box and let Klaus out. He ran out of his room, which he was scared of now, and went into the library. He looked up a couple of books about escape but didn't find any. So he decided to pack some of his stuff and leave. And after twenty minutes of packing, he was ready to run away. Klaus quietly opened his window and climbed out. The air was musty smelling and foggy. The worst part was that it was dark. Since Klaus's room was on the bottom floor, it was easy for him to make his escape. Everything was going perfectly fine for the youngest Baudelaire-- Sunny isn't born yet-- until he saw a limping dark figure coming towards him. Trembling with fear, Klaus ran to the left, away from his house, but did not notice that the figure was following him.  
  
After a minute or two of staggered running, Klaus got tired and began walking. He didn't notice the figure, though. So he sat down to open his bag and take a drink when he heard the not-so-distant shout of, "Hey you over there!" Klaus turned his head so fast that his neck popped a bit and he squealed with pain. Klaus could've screamed at seeing how close the figure was, but decided not to act chicken-ish at the moment. He now regretted ever leaving home and promised himself that he would never leave again if he made it back. Klaus gathered his wits and finally answered the guy back. "Who are you?" said Klaus wearily. The limping figure was getting closer and closer through the fog. "I am the one who created you. I am Lemony Snicket. The one who began your world and now I've come here to end it." said the dark figure who identified himself as Lemony Snicket.  
  
A/N: I'm sorry this was a really short chapter but it's my first try at a fanfic. Kali doesn't come into the story until later. 


	2. Doom

Chapter Two- Doom  
  
Disclaimer: I'm too lazy to type it, so look at it on the first chapter, if you're so desperate to se it.... A/N: Sorry about thu spellng mistokes, I'm typeeing on a chaep Windws 95 laptop. = Typed it that way on purpose. ^.^  
  
"Lemony Snicket...." muttered Klaus. He was busy thinking about the guy's name. It sounded.... familiar somehow. Then he got it. "I've heard of you before, Lemony Snicket! You know my parents from a meeting I overheard. I also remember seeing you in a book! And you're--" Klaus was cut off short by the furious cry of,  
"Will you hurry up and come here, child?! And shut up-- and listen to me." Klaus was shivering. He whimpered a little and asked, " What do you want, Mr. Snicket?"  
He heard the rustle of leaves and Lemony's answer. "I want to tell you about V.F.D."  
Klaus's face lit up. The only thing he knew about V.F.D. was that it was named V.F.D., it was an organization of some sort, and that the members chanted 'The world is quiet here' before getting on to their meeting. He knew this because of spying his parents. Klaus was almost sure that his parents were a part of it.  
Klaus got so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't feel it when the man grabbed his ankles. But when the man tried to pull him up, he retreated by kicking the man and trying to run off. But Lemony Snicket ran after him through the huge field beside his house and right to Klaus's window. Klaus quickly climbed into his room, panting, and ran to his door... but it was jammed. Lemony crashed through the window, causing a loud, distracting noise and shattered glass to fly across Klaus's room. Klaus was desperately looking for something to bring the door down, when he found a big plastic toy. He threw it at Lemony's head, but missed. Klaus was getting more nervous by the second, as Lemony was being entertained.  
He calmly walked around Klaus's room saying, "You can't not miss me, because I am faster than you, and you are a fake."  
Klaus backed himself against a wall and screamed, "I am not a fake! Besides, you're not the Snicket I thought you were. It was Jacques!"  
Lemony stared at Klaus quietly for a moment, then hissed, "Do not ever speak of my brother, you insolent little brat!"  
This time, Klaus lunged himself at Lemony, thinking he could do something. Instead, Lemony ran around Klaus's room, now desperate to get out of there. They ran around and around until Lemony finally jumped out of the window he had cracked.  
A minute later, Violet and Mr. Baudelaire uselessly stepped into Klaus's room now that Lemony was gone. "What in the world is going on here?" asked Mr. Baudelaire, looking around the room.  
Klaus got desperate and said, "Lemony Snicket ran off... get him!!!" And with that, both Mr. Baudelaire and Klaus scrambled out the window to look around at the foggy night... but there was nothing to be seen but thick fog.  
Violet was now tying her hair up in a ribbon-- the sign that she was thinking-- and said, "Klaus, I need to get on the roof."  
They stared at her. "Why?" asked Klaus.  
Violet said, "The fog wasn't so thick when we first went into your room. I know it because I was staring at the window. And fog doesn't get ten times thicker in seconds. Someone must be on the roof with a fogging machine. Maybe it's the Lemony Snicket person you're talking about.  
Klaus stared at his sister. She had a thing for wonderful ideas. "Good point," he said, never doubting his sister's idea.  
Violet was already climbing out the window and looking around when Mr. Baudelaire turned to look at her. "Uhhh...Violet?" he asked, but Violet ignored him. She ran to the left, towards her back yard, and told Klaus and her dad to wait for her. They waited-- but very anxiously.  
Violet went to her back yard towards a tree she used to climb on her roof. She started climbing, and was soon on her roof. This was three stories off the ground. Sure enough, at the other end of her roof she saw a lopsided figure with its back turned towards her. She gasped a little bit and tried to speak, but her throat was dry. The man heard Violet's attempts to talk and turned around. "Violet," the figure said coolly. "It's nice to see you; I was expecting us to meet soon."  
Violet stared, not at the man, but at the other outline of a human. It seemed to be hanging off a pole on the side of the roof.... Then Violet knew. It was a human girl, because of the long hair, and she seemed to be screaming, but there was something over her mouth....  
All of a sudden, the cry of, "Violet!" came from the ground. Violet walked to the edge of her roof, and looked down. A man with short dark hair and skinny arms was holding a fire lit torch.  
Behind her, Violet heard, "That's right. It's either your best friend Kali dead or your house burned. You pick one. I must really say it is foolish to...." But Violet wasn't listening. She was thinking of a way to get her friend Kali and her house out of this.  
And then Violet knew what to do. She turned around to face the man, and asked, "Who are you?"  
He looked at her straight in the eyes and said, "Lemony Snicket."  
Violet thought of the name as Klaus did and asked, "Will you do no harm to my home and my friend if I throw myself off instead?"  
Lemony looked at her suspiciously and said, "Yes, I accept your idea."  
He ushered Violet to the topmost corner of her house and asked, "Are you so sure about this...Violet?"  
She looked around, ignoring Lemony, and then she found it. Lemony couldn't see that where he was throwing her from, there was a small but sturdy tree near to the ground. She could hang on to that and survive. From behind her, she heard Lemony whisper, "Are you?" "Yes," said Violet confidently, while thinking how wrong adults were in thinking that kids were stupid. But before Lemony pushed Violet off, she screamed as loud as she could, "Lemony Snicket!!!!!!"  
  
A/N: I am so tired, and I still have to wait for my dad to get offline....urrrrg!! Well, I hope you liked my second chapter and just so you know, Kali is based on me. 


End file.
